By Jeffrey Stern
Every association has them: Members who sit at meetings with arms folded and legs crossed, who never volunteer for committees, don’t participate in discussions and whose only reason for being there is because the bylaws include an attendance requirement.
They’re not necessarily harming anyone, but they’re certainly not helping anyone, either. As an association leader, you have two choices. You can ignore the behavior, figuring that it’s better to let a sleeping dog lie. Or you can attempt to turn that bump on a log into a viable, valuable member of your group.
Whether your entreaties are met with indifference or even anger, you may find out the source of the member’s unhappiness and address it. And you’ll sleep better knowing you tried.
Here are four ways you can rebuild the fire in a dormant member.
1. Use flattery. There’s nothing like an ego stroke to change a person’s attitude. Start with one-on-one side conversations before or after meetings to find out how the official is doing. Perhaps they have a plum assignment coming up. Compliment the member and wish him or her well. “Hey, that’s a great match-up. I’m jealous. But I’m sure you’ll do a great job.”
During the educational part of the meeting, toss a “softball” question at the recalcitrant official and let him or her show off rules, mechanics or philosophy knowledge.
2. Assign a task. Whether it’s something as seemingly menial as passing out a handout or collecting ballots from the annual election, getting the otherwise disinterested member off his or her chair and doing something other than taking up space can break the ice.
If the member in question is a knowledgeable veteran, ask him or her to make a presentation at a meeting. Understand that some people aren’t comfortable as a public speaker. But others may be waiting to be asked. Be sure to set reasonable but firm parameters so the topic is covered properly and within the time allotted. The presentation doesn’t have to include a lot of bells and whistles like film or PowerPoint and may be as simple as discussing a play he or she faced and how it was handled.
If the disinterest is a relatively new phenomenon, the member may have given a stellar presentation in the past. Ask him or her to review it to see if the information is still accurate and relevant and present it again. “That was one of my favorite programs. Some of our newer members would benefit from it and the others can get something out of it, too.”
3. Seek their advice. Give the member a chance to puff up by relating a past success. That can be done in a one-on-one conversation. Get things rolling with a general question such as, “Did you ever have a coach who complained about a call and wouldn’t let it go even long after the play was over?” Of course, anyone who has officiated any length of time will say yes to that question. But even if you don’t agree with their method of handling those situations, asking gives the member the impression you think their experience has worth.
Another option is to call on the member in the course of the meeting. “Sue, you’ve worked a lot of big games in your career. You’ve faced this situation a million times. How do you handle it?” lets the rest of the group know there’s someone in the room whose insight is valuable. Perhaps it will lead to less experienced members seeking out that member for advice or commiseration.
Even if the targeted member is not blessed with a great deal of experience, you can get them involved. “Kevin, maybe you can teach some of us old dogs a new trick. How would handle that play?”
4. Express gratitude. As with flattery, sometimes the member just wants a little extra attention. It doesn’t hurt to express gratitude that they are still part of the group, even if they don’t contribute as much as you’d like.
“Hi, Pat. Good to have one of our loyal regulars back with us,” is all it takes to let a member know he or she is not just viewed as a source of annual dues.
If a disgruntled official left your group and returned, after either a long or short absence, make them feel welcome and let them know there are no hard feelings. “We missed you, Chris,” is all it takes sometimes to smooth ruffled feathers.
Jeffrey Stern is Referee’s senior editor.
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